EXCUSE ME

I STILL FUCKING EXIST, OKAY?

YOU CAN’T PRETEND LIKE NOTHING IS WRONG. YOU CAN’T PRETEND LIKE I’M JUST GOING TO GO AWAY. THINGS ARE NOT OKAY RIGHT NOW. FUCKING TALK TO ME AND ACKNOWLEDGE THAT, OR AT LEAST ACKNOWLEDGE ME. HOW DO I GO FROM BEING IN YOUR LIFE EVERY FUCKING DAY TO NOT EVEN EXISTING TO YOU?

It just hurts so much. Please fix it… 

Daddy please hear this song that I sing
In your heart there’s a spark that just screams
For a lover to bring a child to your chest that could lay as you sleep
And love all you have left like your boy used to be
Long ago wrapped in sheets warm and wet

Blister please with those wings in your spine
Love to be with a brother of mine
How he’d love to find your tongue in his teeth
In a struggle to find secret songs that you keep wrapped in boxes so tight
Sounding only at night as you sleep 

And in my dreams you’re alive and you’re crying,
As your mouth moves in mine, soft and sweet,
Rings of flowers ‘round your eyes
And Ill love you for the rest of your life when you’re ready

Brother see we are one in the same
And you left with your head filled with flames
And you watched as your brains fell out through your teeth
Push the pieces in place 
Make your smile sweet to see 
Don’t you take this away 
I’m still wanting my face on your cheek

And when we break we’ll wait for our miracle
God is a place where some holy spectacle lies 
When we break we’ll wait for our miracle
God is a place you will wait for the rest of your life

Two headed boy she is all you could need
She will feed you tomatoes and radio wires
And retire to sheets safe and clean
But don’t hate her when she gets up to leave

I’m Just Worried.

I am happy without you right now… but only because I’ve found something else to make me happy, sometime familiar yet new. Am I really ready to let go completely? I still think of you… I am just worried about what is going to happen when I actually have to see you in person… when you can’t ignore me anymore… 

Your kisses taste of apathy and deceit, yet I still crave them.

This is where it is going. Piss drunk, by myself, in my closet, smoking a cigarette, and remembering that you don’t care enough to be here…

Don’t Stumble Over Something Behind You.